And in the balance...

Syd’s daycare has a late pick-up policy, which includes fines, and after 5 lates in 6 months, immediate expulsion from daycare. We are at 4 lates, and are actively seeking another daycare. This has been a pretty big downer for the last two days since we got our “probationary’ notice- lots of tears and angst on my part, and lots of feeling shamed and blamed- score one for the dark side.

Rob and I have been together for a year. This is our “anniversary” weekend. We had each arranged 3 days off, and I had vague ideas of a low-key celebration of this life-altering event. Rob, it turns out, had no such vagueness. He arranged for our babysitter to come over, his boys to be at their mother’s and for us to go to the world-class Sooke Harbour House resort, overnight, without children. The man is a wonder and a blessing, and we agree that we have reaped a well-deserved reward from life in finding each other- score one for the bright side.

After our exquisite supper at the resort, we were deciding whether to use the oceanside hot tub, the fireplace or that big, inviting bed first when my cell phone rang. There was Sam, in tears, barely discernible through a fading cell signal. The kids were both still up, missing mum, filled with over-tired, late-night anguish about mum being away (is it because I’m a widowed parent that I imagine they fear that I won’t return?). I did what I could to be reassuring over the phone, and suggested that they could sleep in my bed while I was gone for the night. Let’s hope that that suggestion doesn’t backfire... The phone call was disconcerting, which would seem to be another point for the dark side.

As I write this, though, I am relaxed from the hot tub, at peace from the sound of the surf outside, full from a delicious meal, warmed by a crackling fire and snuggled with a man who loves me (in spite of my forays into the dark side), and who wants to spend the rest of his days celebrating life with me. The balance looks pretty healthy from here.