Optimism, "The Secret", "Pay It Forward", what goes around comes around, the meek shall inherit the earth, karma....
These are the sorts of sentiments I tend to abide by. They have served me well throughout my life; I am generally lucky with parking spots, luggage, love. I do buy insurance for some things, but eschew it for others, thinking "what will be will be".
The topic of pre-nuptial agreements came up on the board recently; I was taken aback by how many people were adamantly in favour of them. I can't quite understand the sentiment. I don't understand why someone would plan for the demise of their relationship, right on the eve of making a commitment to "forever"- it just doesn't make sense to me. Certainly, there are exceptional circumstances, and protection against these may be desirable, but...
Maybe it comes down to living life, in the moment, with joy and abandonment and passion. I don't always manage this, myself, but I aspire to it. I spend far too much time on the computer these days to be a true devotee of impassioned living. I refuse, however, to live my life wrapped in cotton-wool. As one widow, "out" one week longer than I, put it: "I REFUSE to live on the side-lines of life". She has grabbed hold of said life, and has just remarried, to a widower. A widower from the board, also "out" a week longer than I, has also just remarried, to a widow from the board. They aspire to be married for "a damn long time".
I'm willing to bet that neither of these couples has signed a pre-nuptial agreement. I bet neither couple is going to squander more than a moment of this next chapter in their lives fearing things that MAY go bump in the night. Even at 10 months out from what is probably the most seminal event in their lives, two of these young widders have "grabbed the brass ring" for a second time (another young widow's expression) and have chosen to let JOY, rather than fear, rule their lives. I salute them for this, and hope to be right behind them. (Can I have my new house with Sweetie next month, please?)
Monday, June 25, 2007
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1 comment:
Sally, I was a bit shocked by the replies on that thread too. If you can't trust the person you are about to marry with sitting down and drawing up a will that does right by your children and your late spouse's memory.....then why are you getting married to that person? Going into a committed relationship on the defensive and trying to "proof" it against disaster is not good for either party. It also shows, in my opinion, a decided lack of communication on important issues and maybe a bit of a lack of respect for each other. But again, just my opinion.
Great blog piece today. Good luck with the house thing.
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